Moving.

Welp this blog has been nice. Vented my frustration here and there. Shared good memories. Cried a lot.

I've moved posts to my drafts. I don't think it's necessary for people to read them anymore, haha. And I want to forget about them, since I've started anew and all. I'm pretty much a whole new person now.

Um, yeah. So I'm creating a new personal blog again for my personal posts. It seems that when I write them online, I think clearer lol.

I just need to think of a URL. ._.

Deleted some posts.

Actually moved them to my drafts. But they're still unviewable~

Ahh, I used this blog to vent, but I don't think I want to remember those things now. I'm far from them anyway, and I've completely forgotten about them.

I'll still use this blog for super personal posts I can't seem to post on Tumblr. It's kind of nice, I feel like I'm talking to myself or a stranger I don't really know lol. :3 But I don't really rely on anyone to tell my problems to, so I just write them down or post them here.

Ciao.

My last post was last year omg

Life update kinda! My account was disabled for almost a year, methinks.

So now I'm in Canada. I probably should have wrote about that, lol. But I spend most of my days in Tumblr now. My whole personality has changed, too. A lot has happened the past year. By that, I mean a l o t. I've met tons of new friends. I've realized a lot of things as well. I guess it's the moving thing, but I'm thinking clearly now.
Oh but here's my 2010 summary post: http://pokkin.tumblr.com/post/2542637917

My last post was about TLA movie, huh? (WHICH I WAITED TWO YEARS FOR) But now, there's a new fandom craze.

The Last Airbender: The Legend of Korra

EEEEE I am literally crying rn. Although I said I've changed, the Avatard within me is still here. <3
So there's Korra, Mako, Bolin... then Korra's animal companion, Naga. And the main antagonists, the "Equalists". I'm excited for what will become of this show! Too bad they moved the air date Fall 2012, instead of this year, though. *sniff*

And this is the trailer I've watched a bajillion times and still can't stop crying

And so I should plan an A:TLA marathon soon.

A Life With Agap 2 II

Bad mood = caution: foul language and bad content

Part two. Hm, I know most of you people, especially you, my dear dear classmates, don't give a shit of what I'm saying, but since I don't have anyone who I can lean on and tell my silly issues, I'm just gonna write here. My online diary. Boo yahh.

I've been pitiful. For the past week I've been feeling more down than ever. Oh god. Just how long will I have to be with them? =.=

Okay, so when we were in our Values Education class last Tuesday, we had an Open Forum. Where t'was the time we open up ourselves to the class. I had soo much to tell. Because I still have A LOOT of problems with my "classmates". I was very nervous, though. My hands were shaking...and there's this thing that keeps me from raising my hand. I murmured to myself that I had something to say, then my seatmate (my buddy from past post), encouraged me. But I was still reaaallly nervous. Because I'm not really the type who can open up easily and go all BOO-HOO dramatic. So I just said: "I'll just let them finish."

It was like...very few minutes before the bell rings when I had the urge to raise my hand. So I asked one simple question as quickly as I could: "Besides quiet, what other things do you think about me?" ...The class paused for a few seconds. Each second is like...dunno...10 heartbeats? xD (lol) Was nervous. And then...this girl raised her hand. She said, "Makisali ka naman sa amin minsan.". In English, it means "Join with us every once in a while." ...Uhh...DUHH. It's already o b v i o u s. And I think I heard one guy said "Boring." They laughed. And then the bell rang. So the teacher said we'll continue next week.

Boring...boring, huh? Their thickheadedness strikes again.

I'm waiting desperately for Tuesday now. I feel like, I want to do a 50-minute speech in front of them. Just to say how I feel. But then again...maybe they won't plant it in their tiny brains again. I opened up a month ago and it's still the same. Same. Same. Same. Same.

Like, the many times in Facebook. I kept posting...and posting...and posting stuff like "I hope we'll become good friends, Agap 2." or "Talk to me..." and some stuff like that. And kept spamming links about this BLOG just to show how I feel about them. I know, this blog, every post, will show how different I am from the way they think. But know what they said? "It's in English. Damn I'm getting a nosebleed. I didn't continue because I can't understand half of what you're saying." ...English? Damned English? To think...we're in the elite section, the section with the highest grades, can't understand simple English? And what's more, we've been learning the damned language for 8 years since pre-school.

"..." My reaction. Yes, dots. No comment. Just like that.

Or should I be blaming myself? It is a little bit of my fault, too. My only trouble is...well I don't automatically approach people. I wouldn't call it shy, but I just don't like making the first move. Because I...often get left out in the end when I approach the people I like to be friends with. So, to be safe, I'll let them approach me. I mean, most of my best friends now were the ones who made the first move. And I'm really picky. Yeah, how low and foolish of me.

I wish they could understand me, though. Probably, just like what I've said earlier, they won't give a shit of what I'm saying right now. But at least I've said it. I hope...I just, hope that it's not too late. Darn, my first year of high school turns out to be a fail, because of them. And I REAALLLYYY wish they're reading this right now. And reach this point. And maybe...maybe they'll see.

Misunderstood. That's me in my school, kinda. But, they dare think low of my skills? Of what I can do? Of what my ablilities are? Ohoho, they have crossed the line. And because of that...this is kinda stupid but...I deleted all my Agap 2 friends in Facebook. (XD) Make me piss off like this again and I'll delete all connections towards them.

And there goes a waste of a post. Yay. You made it.

A Life With Agap 2

A little piece from Dia. ^^ Uh, wait? Don't know who Dia is? MY DIARY! 8D Yes yes I know I'm not an SC fan anymore. But the name just suits~ plus, it makes "Diary" shorter. XD

Anyway, I want to share you guys an entry I wrote while in school.

[Sat. Nov. 7, 2009]

Dear Dia,


It's 9:55 AM, and I'm in school today...ugh. ON A SATURDAY. I've really been feeling rather lonesome lately. I mean, more lonely than ever.


-My friend's name here- doesn't go to the canteen anymore. I can't be with her friends since I'm not really really friends with her classmates. (except for 1 or 2) And in Crunchyroll I don't get to talk much with my fav buds anymore. Just how do I get over this? I can't be alone forever. Damn life is hard.


Ohoho, I'll try Kobato. in my anime pleasure. I hope it will be awesome...


Ookaaayyyy...I dunno what to say now. Ugh, so bored. Guess I'll just...wait. NEXT PAGE!


*next page*


Mm. My canteen adventure a while ago. Guess I won't call it an adventure. It was really boring. Well anyway, what happened in the canteen was... nothing. I was all alone in their table. And one Agap 1 student came to me because there weren't any tables left. I looked like a fool. I finished my meal early and I had nothing to do afterwards. Sooo boring. I just need something to do so people won't notice me and consider me an unsociable loner. That would just be sad.


And why won't I join my classmates? Ahahaha, wouldn't I look twice more of a fool if I did so? They'll just end up ignoring me anyway. From my every word to how I move and to the way I stand in front of them... nothing. So it's better off not to join them. They forget me, I forget them. Simple.


Though it makes me feel like the sore looser in the class. I pity myself. I tried every way possible to socialize with them and still keep the real "me" at the same time. But I guess it just couldn't work for them. Sucks.


What's wrong with me? Do I have problems that make my situation bad too? Uh. Probably. Maybe I was raised unproperly and thought school as "a place with all the kinds of people that I need to respect thus no self-expression at all". Yeah, maybe. I do treat school a lot different than home. It's just, wrong. I'm always so quiet.


I'll conclude that everyone, including me, is a problem. What a troublesome era I live in.


Damn. Damn. Damn Damn. D a m n. When will I gain total domination of this class. It's been 5 months and I only have 1 friend. Guess I'll go now. Ja.

-my sig. here-

Ow. :( My classmate tried to read my blog but she said she can't. Why? Because it's in freakin' ENGLISH! >O Like, we learn English and she's one of the best English Speakers in class, how could she get a nosebleed just by reading this? =.= Dammit. Which means all my post are total wastes in the eye for them. Dx They can never understand me. >.>

OHH THE DRAMA. XD

A Life With Agap 2

Hmmm...

Lols, new layout. Got this from some website. Too lazy to make one my own. :D

Update...

Well. Life's going...pretty normal lately. =w= ...What? XD Yes, normal. It's the same ol' same ol' boring day in school, as always. I'm always alone. O^O ...Let's not get dramatic.

Just posting this post for the sake of posting. XD Nothing to see here. ;] I think I should write a post about my classmates next time. :O Lol. Jowk.

OH YEAH, HAPPY BIRTHDAY SABINA! >w< ...Lols, I made her this avii gift on CR. I need PS practice. .__. But I hope she likes it. >:D

Well, Ja nee. =3=